May 24th, 2012
I can't believe how busy I am. After a couple of years, I finally am working on my website again and getting it on David's server instead of topcities. Topcities was too unreliable...there were times when my site was down for a couple of weeks, even though I was up to date with my payments and stuff... not working for me!!! So yeah, I haven't had a real site in over a year.
Benji is 5 now and almost ready for Kindergarten.... I'm not! My little boy is growing up so fast!! I know I will miss him when he's going to be in school all day and then goes to bed earlier... but I know it's a good thing too! He's so adorable though! And so smart!
Donny is still working this horrible shift and I wish he would switch to days, but I also know that he just doesn't like the people on first and wouldn't like working there any more! I just wish they would fire him so he would get unemployment for a while and would be able to either find a closer job first shift or go to school for engeneering!
I was diagnosed with ADHD. They did a bunch of tests and there's nothing wrong with my brain... just ADHD and he said I had that all of my life.. just having too much going on in my life, so now I notice it more. Hmmm... I won't try stimulants and I won't take Wellbutrin... so we'll see what Dr. Naik has to say. I can't believe how horrible I did with the one test he had me take that was for the ADHD part.. wow!! I did really good on all the memory ones, which is good.. I've always been above average with those kind of tests (like puzzles and stuff). Still haven't lost my stuff..lol.
I'm cutting down on the Daycare come September. I figure Benji is starting school and is going to need me to put him to bed earlier and stuff, so it's only going to be open from 8:15 am to 7:30 pm Monday through Friday. I really am looking forward to it, cause I'm tired of all the long hours too.
Well, gonna go back to doing my website now. :-)

December 19th, 2012
Well, for the first time in almost 10 years, divorce briefly flashed my mind... not because Donny is a horrible husband, but because the way he feels about raising his daughter is going totally against what I feel needs to be done for her to be a decent person. She stole my credit card, so I grounded her and took Christmas away from her. Before she stole the card, she came and went as she pleased and no-one got mad at her for it. She would leave in the wee hours for school and come home at 9:30 at night after school. I tried to tell Donny, but he seemed to just not care, so I quit bitching and let her go. She got F's in school and started sloughing school as well. So then she ordered two kindles on Amazon on my account on my credit card... then she stole my Discover card and bought minutes for her phone. I found out and totally crashed down on her.. grounded her, gave her a few extra chores, took Christmas away from her and told her she needed to let me take her to school Wednesdays and Thursdays. I told her if she does everything she is supposed to she can have her boyfriend over the Saturday before Christmas (1 1/2 weeks away from when I grounded her). She got on the computer that very next morning and I told her now it would be Sunday. So then Monday morning she was at Nathan's house at 3:30 am (and I guess she has done this before, to help him with his paper route). Today she left before I got up and she didn't come home after school. Her Dad's response: we're giving her consequences and she is fighting it, so we shouldn't give her consequences. WHAT? W T F ????? SHE STOLE MY FUCKING CREDIT CARD!!! What part of this does he not get??? Anyway... it briefly crossed my mind.. then I thought of all the good things and that it's just another 3 years and she's GONE! GONE! GONE!!!! He thinks Jessica turned around, so she will too. With Jessica it was more a fight between her and me and cleaning. It's different with Emily. But that's ok.... I'm letting it go. I have to. I have a boy that loves his Daddy. And I love him too... I just don't agree with his parenting skills. So.. I told him..if she turns out like Teresa... it's not going to me that anyone can blame.. they can blame him!!! I done my part and was shut down.. :-( I would welcome a strong aun flare.. no more easy life.. I could adjust... I hate what Emily has done to us!